Love is colorblind

Di post kali ini, aku lagi ingin "ngomongin" orang. tapi bukan ngomongin yang jelek yahh.... tapi ngomongin betapa hebatnya pasangan ini. Kenapa aku bilang hebat? karena mereka sangat berbeda dari latar belakang agama, budaya dan bangsa. Udah lumrah kali kalo kita melihat ada bule punya pacar asia. Tapi yang ini benar-benar beda. One in a million.

The woman is my best friend in melbourne. Namanya Devi Gunawan, asal Jakarta dan dia orang chinese, beragama katolik. Sedangkan.. Cowoknya orang India (Putih n cakep hehehe.....) --> bisa dijitak ama depi. dan dia beragama Islam. Namanya Irfan Peerzada.



Mereka pun ketemu di dunia maya. Zaman dulu , taon 2003an Friendster lebih dulu terkenal. jadi mereka kenal dari sana. Waktu itu irfan di sydney. Jadi setelah hubungan lewat friendster, mereka saling tuker nomer hp beberapa bulan memutuskan untuk "kopi darat". awalnya aku, dia dan temen2 sempet panik. Gimana kalo cowok ini ga bener? akhirnya waktu mereka janjian ketemu untuk pertama kalinya, Temen-temen dan aku pada ngikutin diem-diem dari belakang. Memang janjian ketemunya di public place. Waktu itu disekitar Crown Casino... masih inget pas dulu kita mengendap-endap kayak detekftif dibelakang depi n irfan.

Makin hari, mereka makin deket. Aku sedikit ngasih warning ma depi. Walaopun secara aku islam dan depi katolik, aku tetep ngasi saran kalo dia berhubungan pasti susah karena ga seagama. Waktu itu dia menyangkal kalo ini cuman maen-maen. Pada akhirnya, si depi bilang ke aku, "I love him so much".... and the journey begun...

Suatu ketika, si depi bilang ke aku, "Gimana kalo gw masuk Islam?".
Trus aku bilang, "lo tetep katolik ato lo masuk Islam, ga akan ada bedanya buat gw. because I like ur personality. I love u as my friend. Nothing can change that. I respect you in many ways. semuanya keputusan ada di kmu, and as my ur friend..my only duty is to support you".

Aku tidak akan bilang kalo jalan mereka cukup gampang. Karena banyak perbedaan, mulai dari agama, ras dan bangsa.. memacu konflik di sekitar keluarga mereka. Tapi syukur saja,,, semuanya berakhir dengan happy ending. Yang paling bikin aku salut adalah mamanya depi. Mamanya bilang, "Devi cuman titipan dari Tuhan. Belum tentu juga jika depi nikah ama pria yang sama-sama chinese dan beragama sama, devi akan mempunyai kebahagian seperti sekarang".....--->aduh tantee.... bikin aku terharu.... begitu besar hatinyaa.....

Now,,, they are married and expecting a babyy!!! kita semua pada penasaran gimana nanti muka babynya... campuran antara chinese and india..pasti cute. I wish them lived happily ever after

Happiness is expensive, but affordable

Untuk menjadi sabar, ternyata luar biasa susahnya. Apalagi ketika aku dipaksa untuk melakukan yang tidak aku ingin. Dan tahukah mereka bahwa ini benar menyakitkan hati?

Maksud hati mereka, ingin memberikan yang terbaik buat aku. Tapi sebenarnya yang terbaik untuk mereka. Aku hanya ingin mereka mengerti. Bahwa kehidupan aku ini tidaklah sempurna. Aku menerima tanpa mengeluh terhadap segala tanggung jawab yang dibebankan. Aku berkompromi dengan segala kekurangan yang ada, dan aku pun mau mereka juga berkompromi dengan kekurangan. Aku tidak memilih untuk dilahirkan dengan situasi dan tanggung jawab seperti ini. Setidaknya dimana hak pilih yang aku punya untuk menentukan masa depan? Hak untuk memilih dengan siapa yang aku mau.

Saat ini, aku sedang mendapat “money–cant-buy-your-happiness” lesson. Apalah arti hidup berlebihan, jika aku tidak mempunyai impian.

I’m one of the poorest human on this planet because I cant grab my own dream

Dan hidup yang aku jalanin ini kosong. I feel like I’m zombie. Physically is there, but with no soul.

Happiness is the most expensive thing in this world,but it should be free and affordable

...berserah...

Ini semua salah saya. Salah saya yang jauh dariMu sehingga saya tidak terlindungi. Sudah puluhan orang tempat saya bertanya dan tidak satupun dari mereka, saya mendapatkan jawaban yang memuaskan. Hingga saya sadar bahwa saya bertanya pada tempat yang salah.

Ini semua membuat saya malu dan bertekuk lutut mengharap iba. Maafkan atas kesombongan dan rasa ego yang tinggi. Saya terlalu mendewakan diri dan meng-klaim bahwa cuman saya yang tahu apa yang terbaik untuk saya. Ibaratnya saya adalah pensil, ternyata masih ada yang menggerakkan tulisan kehidupan saya, yaitu Engkau.

Untuk mencari jawaban itu, saya sadar bahwa saya harus berserah dan memasrahkan segalanya dengan hati ikhlas. Tidak mudah bagi saya untuk berada di titik nol. Ternyata belajar untuk ikhlas sangatlah tidak mudah karena saya tidak berhadapan dengan orang lain. Melainkan saya menundukkan diri sendiri. Keikhlasan pada akhirnya nanti akan menjadi kemenangan batin saya. Dari sini, saya bisa mengukur tolak kesabaran dan pengorbanan yang mampu saya berikan.

"....Saya memohon pilihan menurut pengetahuanMu, dan memohon penetapan dengan kekuasaanMu, juga saya memohon karuniaMu yang besar, sebab sesungguhnya Engkaulah yang berkuasa dan saya tidak berkuasa, Engkaulah yang Maha Tahu sedangkan saya tidak mengetahui apa-apa. Engkaulah Maha Mengetahui segala yang gaib, Jika Engkau Mengetahui bahwa urusanku ini baik untukku maka takdirkanlah untukku dan mudahkanlah berkah kepadaku di dalamnya. Sebaliknya, jikalau Engkau Mengetahui bahwa urusanku ini jelek untukku, dalam agamaku, kehidupanku serta akibat urusanku, maka jauhkanlah aku daripadanya, serta takdirkanlah untukku yang baik-baik saja dimana saja adanya, Kemudian puaskanlah hatiku dengan takdir itu.."

Dear Friend...

Dear friend..,

When he came to your life… I could see how happy you were.

Whatever you did, you did just for him

Once you said to me, “I’m happy if he’s happy”

That was more than enough to make me know that you deeply cared about him

When he hurt you, I had much anger than you did

When he said nasty things, I completely didn’t understand you

Why u still had a patience to treat him good?

I thought u was out of your mind

You never meant to blame him for causing you so much pain

Instead, you always tried to understand him…

And you always asked me back,

“Tell me what I did wrong here?”

And my answer was and it is always be,

“You did nothing wrong”

When he can’t appreciate your beauty…

Excuse me, I’m sorry if I say this but never regret to say

He’s just insane… He’s blind

His words ain’t gonna let you down

You’re a beautiful in soul and in any way

You can count on my words because,

I know you longer than he does

You cried yesterday… you cried last nite

You will cry tonite and tomorrow but,

You ain’t gonna cry next week because,

Your tears worth millions star, u aren’t gonna waste it, are you?

Cry for someone who madly loves and cares about you unconditionally…

You smiled today… you laughed today with me but,

You still can’t hide your pain from me

You told me a flashback story and made it as a joke

But, I know deep in your heart, it was painful realities

You didn’t mean to fake it, you’re just fighting to be stronger

And you will be…dear

Whatever tomorrow will be….

With or without him, you will survive because,

He just took your heart, not your dream

Dream is a beginning of a spirit, a spirit to catch another love again

If there is soul of an angel hiding inside human’s body

It must be you, my beautiful friend

And it is shame on him for not knowing it

(Dedicated to my best friend)

ps: I wrote this short mssg to my best friend cos she was having tough times with her x-bf. It happened 4 years ago. She ended up breaking up him, which I though very wise decision to do so.

All of You and I are the rainbow

Many people walked in and out of my life, but you girls left footprints in my heart. Life handed me the bad and good things, one of the greatest gifts I received was the love from all of you. "Thank you" were always meant to say, but it never feels enough. I am the person who can't get along easily with someone, yet somehow you could find the best of me.

It started with just couple of us. Then I was close with one of you, then you brought them, other friends. Finally, there we were - five of us. The bond was born.

I must say that I am so blessed. You make my time here so much worthy. God had been so good to me by bringing all of you into my life. I know, there has been so many ups and downs, yet we manage to give each of our shoulder's to cry on, to give our hands to reach out, to lend our ears to hear. I would never found any friendship like this for the rest of my life. We do not hide from who we are. Either being an evil nor an angel, we are honest about ourself.

The most beautiful thing in this friendship is, we still love each other even with our imperfectness. Sometimes, it is easier to love someone because their perfectness rather than their imperfectness. I had someone telling me, "A friend is someone who thinks you're a good egg even though you're slightly cracked".

Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo,Violet are the colors of the rainbow. Each of them has unique stand out shinning color. It truly reflects the differences on us.We are just bunch of girls having different personalities, different religion, and different race. But then, we are beautifully melting, so sometimes I don't feel that the differences still exist. Just like a rainbow. You see the differences are still there, but somehow when others people look at it, they will think that the friendship we have treasured are beautiful to see. Just like people feel the beauty of the rainbow when they see it.

Do you know why I keep you inside my circle of life? Why I feel so much warmth and comfort around you? because somehow, you make me as a better person in so many ways. Not living in Melbourne means I will not be saying goodbye to you all because this is not the end of our friendship. Our story has just got started. In future, let this our story pass onto our children - just let them know something that we are already proud of. Actually, I have lots of many things to say, but I can't describe it into good words. I just wanna let you know, I love you more than even words I say. Although, we are kept at distance - there is not single thing that gonna change what we have. You know why? Cos I keep all of you at the bottom of my heart, it's not gonna easily tear it off.

Damn! why I never sense the vibe

Couple of days ago, I had afternoon coffee with Gerald and Nanthinee - my closest friends on campus. We sat down and had chat for almost three hours. Mainly, we talked about relationships. Out of nowhere, I told them that K called me last week and talked to me almost an hour. K is our friend on campus but we are not really close to him. He asked me to have lunch with him, as a return because I helped him throughout the semester. Without hesitation, I agreed to it and said to him and I would bring Gerald and Nanthinee to join with us.

I had not thought it would matter that much until Gerald brought this issue to the surface.
"Why don't u just reject the offer, and saying that he does not owe you anything", said Gerald
"Why would I do that? I'm just being friendly", I response
"Yeah well, I'm afraid he misunderstood you. Cmon, he talked to you almost an hour. Don't you think it's weird", said Gerald
"Don't be to alarmed. He knows I'm in relationship. So I guess, that misunderstanding you're talking about is not true", I argued
"What kind of conversation, you actually had with him over the phone?", he asked
"Just simple conversation like you guys and I always have", I answered
"Did you talk alot about your boyfriend?", he interrogate me
"No.. cos he did not ask"
"That's the point! you don't have picture of your bf and u on facebook, you dont talk alot about your bf. He might think that you lied that you're in relationship or he suspect that you are not serious." He explains....
"Oh my God, I'm just being friendly. That's it! Like I'm being friendly to you guys"
"I know you're friendly, but do not be too friendly. It's not good Mirna. We are closer to you and we know you, that's why we never misunderstood you. but he is not close to you so, perhaps there's slightly chance that he get your response the wrong way", said Gerald

Nanthinee added, "Yeah I guess, you need to step back little bit. Hey you know, I helped him too but he does not ask me!!"
Gerald, "See! that's what I'm talking about. Just limit your phone conversation next time he calls you. Well hopefully, I'm wrong. But I suspect he might have feeling for you or even worse, he just want to get you in bed!"
"Hey! don't scare me by saying that", I said
"I dont scare you, just alarm you. Hey, remember when you had the psycho guy chasing after you, you couldn't stop him until you stop being friendly to him", Gerald said.


Why I would never be able to sense the vibe when guys has crush on me. It happen quite often since junior high. I never realized it until my friends told me that. My friends were the ones who can feel the vibe if there was guy liking me. Because of "this lack of talent", I had been snapped with one of my friends in high school. He said to me in front of my class mates, "Hey Mirna, I like you alot" and I was laughing and laughing....while everyone was quite and staring at me furiously. I said to him, "Well thanks, that's quite funny". "Hey, be serious!! Don't take this as a joke cos I'm deadly serious saying this to you!" he angered. I was stoned for a while. I thought he was joking cos most of time, he always made a joke and I did not feel that he liked me.

Before I was in relationship with my bf, I did not sense the vibe too!! until my bestfriend, Rina told me.
She asked me on the day after I had him coming over to my house, "So how was it?".
"It was nice and we talked alot, he went home quite late at 11", I answered
"huh? what time he came to your house?", she asked
"Around 7, I guess. Why?"
"I think he likes you, he enjoys talking to you" she said
"Oh no no no.....he did that because I'm his bestfriend's sister"
"Ah..don't be stupid! you will soon find out that he likes you. Trust me", She replied

She was right.
Gee,are Gerald and Nathinee right that I need to get more lessons on "how to sense the vibe"?